Chapter 1 …
It was a summer where dazzling sunlight poured down onto every single green leaf.
“Yoo Eun-saem, do you seriously not have anyone you like?”
It was after academy class. I was eating a hamburger with Park Chan-seong when he asked the question casually while squeezing ketchup onto his tray.
“Yeah. I don’t.”
“Really?”
He pushed the empty ketchup packet aside and nodded.
“Then do you know Ahn Yoo-heon from Class 6? During the truth game at the retreat, he said you were the person he liked.”
I already knew that.
There was no way not to know. The day after the retreat, whenever I entered even the slightest radius near Ahn Yoo-heon, the kids from Class 6 openly started teasing.
“That’s what I heard.”
“He actually asked me about you. Asked if you liked anyone. When I said I didn’t know, he told me to find out. I mean, why tell me to ask? He could just ask you himself.”
Chan-seong’s tone was full of complaints, and I chuckled as I picked up my hamburger.
I held it with both hands and opened my mouth wide to take a bite when I noticed someone walking along the sidewalk across the street.
Even from far away, I could see the softly swaying hair, the pale smooth face, the long straight limbs.
My eyes widened.
“So I can tell Ahn Yoo-heon you don’t like anyone, right?”
Chan-seong said.
But whether he spoke or not, my mind had already drifted across the street.
There he was—wearing the uniform of a nearby middle school.
He stood at the crosswalk waiting for the light to change, and he looked even taller than the last time I had seen him.
Maybe he’d won it from a street lottery, or maybe someone had given it to him as a gift—tucked under his arm was a large stuffed doll.
It looked unexpectedly cute.
“Are you listening?”
Seeing that I didn’t answer, Chan-seong asked again.
I nodded to show I was listening, but my gaze stayed fixed across the street.
The boy was wearing a summer uniform.
A large tree stood beside the crosswalk, and its shade fell over him at an angle. As the green leaves fluttered in the breeze, sunlight poured through them, making the shadows sway.
It felt like green light was raining down.
Under that light stood Nam Chae-hyun.
He was just standing there quietly, but the sight made me think of the shimmering ripples I had once seen on the sea under bright sunlight.
“Oh—Ahn Yoo-heon just messaged me.”
Chan-seong held out his phone for me to see.
“He’s asking if I asked you. Should I tell him you don’t like anyone?”
Watching Chae-hyun as the wind lightly fluttered his uniform shirt, I spoke.
“No. Tell him I do.”
“You do? You like someone? Is that okay?”
I nodded while watching Chae-hyun stare down at his phone, not even noticing the traffic light change.
The summer uniform suited him really well.
I was still in elementary school back then, unable to wear a uniform myself, and just the fact that he wore one made him feel like someone who had already moved far ahead of me.
“Man… I’m bad at lying. It won’t be obvious, right?”
Chan-seong said.
I didn’t answer.
I had never told anyone, but I did like someone.
A boy in a school uniform, holding a stuffed doll under his arm.
He was the older brother of my friend.
And he was the person I secretly liked all by myself.
The first time I saw Chae-hyun that summer was through a window, when I was in sixth grade.
Time passed. I became a middle school student.
And I still liked him.
* * *
It was a day when rain suddenly poured down without any forecast.
Kids who hadn’t brought umbrellas called their homes. Those who couldn’t get someone to come pick them up grabbed broken umbrellas lying around the school—or simply ran home in the rain.
“Hey, Park Chan-seong. Don’t you have an umbrella?”
I had just come down the stairs with my bag when Nam Seo-yeon, standing by the entrance of the old building and staring at the cloudy sky, asked him.
“Nope. Looks like you don’t either.”
Chan-seong said, glancing at Seo-yeon’s empty hands.
Seo-yeon immediately wrapped her arm around my shoulders as if to show off.
“But I have Yoo Eun-saem.”
She grinned at Chan-seong.
“Let’s go, Eun-saem.”
She linked arms with me.
I took my umbrella out of my bag and pressed the button.
Pop!
The umbrella opened, and I held it over our heads.
I noticed Chan-seong trying to squeeze his head under it too.
“Hey! Where do you think you’re sticking your head? Go away! There’s no space for you!”
Seo-yeon shoved him aside and started walking faster.
Dragged along by her hand, I hurried across the muddy ground as rain poured down.
Why did Seo-yeon like this awful weather so much? I’d always wondered.
“Do you seriously like rainy days?”
“Yeah. The weather’s always amazing the day after it rains. But you hate rain so much. Why?”
“It’s humid and damp. I hate getting splashed and soaking my legs. And wet shoes are the worst. And when you get on the bus with a folded umbrella and it keeps bumping into other people’s umbrellas… I hate that.”
Our opinions were so clear—and so completely opposite—that we both burst out laughing.
“But it’s funny how you always have an umbrella in your bag whenever it suddenly rains.”
“I just carry one 365 days a year because I hate getting wet.”
“Even in winter? It doesn’t rain then.”
“I don’t know. It’s just a constant.”
Seo-yeon giggled at that.
Since Seo-yeon didn’t have an umbrella, our destination naturally became her house.
“Since it’s raining, let’s order tteokbokki.”
“Okay. Let’s add glass noodles and get hot dogs and gim-mari too.”
“Deal.”
We folded the umbrella and stepped into the elevator.
Without saying anything, we both stared into the mirror and fixed our damp bangs.
“Chan-seong probably walked home in the rain, huh?”
Seo-yeon said while looking at the mirror.
“Then you should’ve let him under the umbrella earlier.”
I replied, watching the mirror on the opposite wall.
“How are three people supposed to share one umbrella?”
“If you’re so worried, go check on him now. Knowing Chan-seong, he’s probably still waiting.”
“Yeah, no. Not that worried. He probably got home fine.”
I turned to look at her sharply.
The elevator panel beeped as we approached her floor.
“You like Park Chan-seong.”
Seo-yeon, who had been looking upward, widened her eyes at me.
“What nonsense are you talking about?”
“Look at your voice getting louder. That means I’m right.”
“I don’t!”
“Oh please.”
The elevator doors opened.
“Wow, you’re unbelievable.”
Seo-yeon hurried out and punched in the door code.
“Why would I like Park Chan-seong? Where do you even come up with this stuff?”
The door opened.
Inside, the familiar scent of Seo-yeon’s house greeted us.
As I took off my sneakers, I began listing the suspicious behaviors my radar had picked up from her.
When we checked class assignments in second year, Seo-yeon saw that she and Chan-seong were in the same class and complained, “Ugh! Why am I in the same class as you?”
But when they were separated in third year, she looked strangely disappointed and came to our classroom every break just to see him.
Whenever Chan-seong was eating something, she would get curious about it—even though she wasn’t the type to ask people for food—and say, “Let me try some,” always stealing at least a small bite.
“And that means I like him?”
Seo-yeon tossed her bag onto the floor.
“Yeah. That’s totally unlike you. I’ve known you longer than a day.”
She didn’t answer.
Watching her flop onto the sofa, I teased,
“So you’re saying you don’t?”
“….”
“I have Chan-seong’s elementary school ID photo.”
“Hey, Yoo Eun-saem.”
Seo-yeon instantly sat up.
Then she slid off the sofa and stared at me.
“Where is it?”
Her attitude looked like she was about to search my pockets like a thief.
I burst out laughing.
“You totally like him.”
“Fine, I do! Chan-seong is ridiculously cute and funny. So give me that photo. Or at least make me a copy. Where is it? Let me see it.”
Her words fired out like a machine gun.
She must really like him.
“Do you think I carry it around? It’s at home. I’ll bring it to school tomorrow.”
“Isn’t school dangerous? What if someone sees it? If you bring Chan-seong’s elementary school photo, people will get suspicious!”
She squeezed her eyes shut as if she didn’t even want to imagine it.
“Bring it secretly.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll buy the tteokbokki in exchange.”
With a determined expression, Seo-yeon pulled out her phone and ordered the food.
“Don’t forget the hot dogs. And gim-mari.”
“I didn’t forget the extra noodles either, so go wash your hands.”
She shoved my back with her foot.
Pretending to lose the fight, I stood and headed to the bathroom.
While washing my hands, I noticed two electric toothbrushes standing side by side.
One belonged to Seo-yeon.
The other belonged to her older brother, Nam Chae-hyun.
As the water ran over my hands, I stared quietly at his toothbrush.
Then suddenly I imagined him standing here, brushing his teeth.
The random thought made my heart pound.
“Seriously… I’m crazy.”
I shook my head and turned off the faucet.
“Did you order?”
I asked, looking at Seo-yeon sitting on the sofa with the remote.
“Yeah.”
She hugged a cushion with one arm and pointed the remote toward the kitchen.
“Wait! There are macarons in the fridge.”
Which meant: go get them.
Because I was closer to the refrigerator.
“Which fridge?”
“The one in front of the dining table.”
Seo-yeon’s house had two refrigerators—one next to the counter, and one by the dining table.
“How many should I bring?”
I asked while opening it.
Then I fell silent.
“As many as we can eat. Just bring some.”
Colorful boxes filled the entire fridge.
When I looked closer, there were cakes, puddings, scones, chocolates—so many desserts.
“Wow… what is all this?”
I grabbed a box with twelve macarons and went back to the living room.
“What happened to the fridge? Did you win the lottery?”
Seo-yeon’s expression stiffened as she picked up a macaron.
“No. It was my stupid brother’s birthday a few days ago.”
When Seo-yeon said “my brother,” she meant—
“Chae-hyun’s birthday?”
“Yeah. He came home carrying all this stuff. I don’t know who’s spoiling that annoying guy like this.”
She popped the macaron into her mouth and smiled happily.
Ah.
A trace of disappointment passed across my face.
One of the few days when I could contact Nam Chae-hyun publicly had been his birthday.
And I had completely missed that chance.
