Chapter 23 …
“Th-This….”
The body wash slipped from his hand and fell to the floor. With a dull thud, it mixed with the sound of running water. Neither of them could say anything.
“How did this end up like….”
“Ow.”
He still wouldn’t let go of what he was holding, so I grabbed his arm and said it.
“Sorry.”
At that, he loosened the hand clutching his chest. He quickly covered himself again with his arm, but whether from embarrassment or something else, his heart was pounding wildly.
“Can you turn around again?”
“…Okay.”
He frowned and let out a deep sigh. Somehow, it felt like he wasn’t angry at me but at himself. He turned his back and seemed to bury his face in his hand. His flawless, beautiful back muscles were laid bare, and every time he breathed, droplets of water splashed and scattered toward me.
“Kal, when someone takes a hallucinogen, what do they usually see? Why do you see me as a woman?”
I asked out of sudden curiosity. I knew it wasn’t like the ordinary hallucinogens I was familiar with. But I didn’t know what kind of visions it caused.
He only sighed deeply instead of answering, so I spoke first.
“If it’s difficult, you don’t have to say.”
One week remained until he would lose control.
But in this state, would he really go berserk? He had grown fairly gentle, close enough to wash together with me.
“I….”
“Hm?”
“What I want to see the most.”
By the time I picked up the body wash from the floor and stood up, he had turned back around.
“What I truly want to see.”
“Huh??”
His expression looked almost resentful. Yet at the same time, he seemed embarrassed.
“I think the woman I saw that day is still on my mind.”
“Ah… I see.”
“It’s because you resemble her.”
“Mm.”
If he went berserk later, would he spare me if I showed him my true appearance?
That thought made him seem a little less frightening.
“Will you wash my hair, Kal?”
“…All right.”
He took the body wash I handed him and was about to pour it into his palm.
“You’re using that much?”
“My hair… looks long.”
“I see.”
He squeezed out nearly half a palmful into his large hand. It worked out well for me, but he really seemed convinced that what he was seeing was a hallucination.
It made sense. Every test subject brought in here was male. And after thorough physical examinations, there was no room for doubt.
They had to enter and leave the washing room naked several times.
“Close your eyes.”
“Okay.”
When I closed my eyes, I couldn’t see anything. It was probably for the best. His expressions were hard to read, and even then, I could only catch the most intense emotions.
Soon, his hand settled gently on my scalp and brushed against my forehead.
“Should I wash your face too?”
“Mm.”
His large hand moved down to my face. I couldn’t feel the warmth of his palm—just his fingers rubbing lightly. I hugged my chest tightly with both arms to cover myself, while water from the showerhead behind him splashed onto me.
“Your face is so small. I think I could cover it with one hand.”
“You’re small too.”
“You’re too small. Feels like you’d break if I grabbed you.”
“Did they inject you with a truth serum too?”
“…Probably.”
He answered so honestly that I couldn’t help asking. His wording was just too straightforward.
“How do I look? I don’t know what the woman in Alec’s room looked like.”
I feigned ignorance on purpose. When I carefully opened my eyes, our gazes met. He was holding my face.
“Ah….”
“If you open your eyes, soap will get in.”
He tried to divert my attention, so I responded lightly.
“Ow….”
Then more water splashed onto my face. He stepped aside briefly and rinsed away the foam. When he stood before me again, turning his back to the showerhead—
“Don’t open your eyes.”
“Okay.”
“And don’t rub them. It’ll go deeper in.”
With his wet hand, he wiped around my eyes. His hand was so hot that I could tell it was his just by the touch.
A rolled-up towel brushed against my thigh, and his skin was touching it too.
“Can I open them now?”
“No.”
Unlike his thigh, which felt like solid stone, what touched my leg felt slightly less hard.
I considered reaching out to grab it, but my arms were too busy covering my chest, so I stayed still.
Still, between the sound of water and Kalisten’s heavy, uneven breathing as he washed my hair, curiosity got the better of me. With one arm covering my chest, I lowered my left hand and reached out.
“What are you doing?”
“Ah, something keeps poking me. Is this your knee?”
“…Yeah.”
Just as I was about to bend down a little to reach it more clearly, he grabbed my shoulder, forcing my eyes open.
“Don’t.”
“Why?”
“Don’t open your eyes either.”
“Oh. Okay.”
At his warning tone, I quickly shut them again. I heard him let out a large sigh.
“Kal, are you embarrassed too?”
“…Yeah.”
Maybe embarrassment had finally caught up to him. Last time, he’d warned me not to even think about looking at his body.
It seemed best for both of us to finish quickly and leave. I covered my chest again with both arms and lifted my chin.
I felt his hot hand against my scalp, his fingers rubbing through my hair. It was ticklish but pleasant. Though he was being so careful, as if afraid of crushing tofu in his grip.
“Are you tense?”
“…Yes.”
Even with my eyes closed, I could sense how stiff he was. Maybe because he insisted it was all a hallucination, my own embarrassment had eased slightly.
After lathering my scalp and hair for a long while, he finally said,
“I’m going to rinse it now, so keep your eyes tightly shut.”
“Okay.”
The water flow grew stronger—he must have stepped aside again. I tilted my head slightly down so water wouldn’t run into my nose. It became much easier to breathe.
I could feel my hair sticking to my chest and collarbone. Thinking it was probably done, I carefully opened my eyes.
He was looking at me with a strange expression.
“Now we have to wash your body.”
“…Right.”
He said that and turned his gaze aside for a moment.
Then, as if having made up his mind, he spoke.
“Wash me. The wounds on my waist and hands hurt.”
“Oh. Okay. That makes sense.”
Suddenly, I realized the wound on my neck didn’t hurt as much as I expected. His injuries, though the bleeding had stopped, were large and long enough to look painful.
“If you’d washed my hair with that hand, it would’ve hurt.”
“It didn’t.”
“Then?”
“It was tiring.”
He was covering his lower half with one hand. He was definitely embarrassed.
I kept my head lifted on purpose so I wouldn’t look down.
“We should turn around now.”
“Okay.”
I placed one hand on his shoulder, and this time I stood with my back to the showerhead. The water running down my back felt wonderful.
“Aselia.”
“Hm?”
“Can’t you lower your arms?”
“Why? Why?? Why???”
I was so flustered that I asked three times before realizing it, which only made me more embarrassed. In a small voice, he said,
“You’re covering yourself, and I’m not. It’s unfair.”
“Ah.”
From his perspective, I could see why he’d think that. Still, I hesitated, too shy to lower my arms.
“If you don’t want to, don’t. I’m not forcing you.”
Come to think of it, even when he’d lost control before, he’d apologized to me repeatedly.
“Does my opinion matter to you? I have to do whatever you tell me. I’m A-rank, after all.”
He frowned. This time, not confused—clearly displeased.
“Why would you say it like that?”
“Huh?”
“Your opinion matters to me. If you don’t want to, don’t just accept everything like that.”
The displeased look on Kalisten’s face softened when our eyes met. He covered his face with his hand and turned away.
“I-It’s not that I don’t want to….”
He looked back at me.
“I’m just embarrassed.”
And slowly, I lowered the arms that had been covering my chest. My head naturally dipped down.
Feeling shy, I muttered,
“Kal, you said to wash you.”
“…Yeah.”
“Turn around.”
“…Okay.”
He suddenly became much more docile. When he turned around, I made sure not to repeat earlier mistakes and reached directly for the body wash in his hand.
“Ah….”
“What is it?”
“I’m taking the body wash.”
“Okay.”
My chest brushed against his back, and somehow he seemed to react even more sensitively than I did, making my face heat up. I took the body wash from him, squeezed some into my hand, and spread it across his back.
“Hold this.”
“Okay.”
I placed the bottle back in his hand and rubbed his back with my palm. The hard muscles, when pressed, felt surprisingly like flesh. When I’d touched them lightly before, they’d felt like stone.
“Ticklish?”
“…No.”
He kept flinching, which I found cute, so I teased him without thinking.
As I tried to rub near his shoulder blades, I said,
“Can you bend down a bit? My calves hurt if I scrub like this.”
I’d been standing on tiptoe and felt like I might fall.
“Ah…!”
Kalisten seemed like the type to act before thinking.
“Wouldn’t it be easier if you climbed on?”
Before I knew it, he grabbed my legs and hoisted me onto his back. The foam on his back transferred heavily onto my chest.
