Chapter 115
“The ride itself doesn’t even last five minutes, but we’ve been waiting for over an hour.”
Jiwoo felt the words rising to her throat. She barely managed to hold them back. If she said that, Noeul, who suggested coming to the amusement park, might feel embarrassed.
“That part-time worker’s tone is amazing,” Noeul said, watching the part-timer with a microphone guide the crowd. “The story itself isn’t that funny, but the way they say it makes everyone laugh.”
“Yeah,” Jiwoo said with a smile.
“That kid’s timing is good. Like, they take a breath after saying, ‘This Viking ride you’re waiting for, the angle of this Viking…’ and then another breath after, ‘the steepest in the country, ba-’ and finally, ‘-ck-s degrees.’ That kind of rhythm.”
Jiwoo giggled at Noeul’s exaggerated tone.
Noeul didn’t stop joking while they waited. Jiwoo felt like he was trying to keep her from getting bored. It was nice that Noeul was doing that for her, but Jiwoo also worried that he might get too exhausted.
She wondered if Noeul felt some pressure to entertain her. Being with Jiwoo should feel easy, not exhausting; otherwise, he might not want to spend time together. Being with Jiwoo shouldn’t feel like a job.
But saying, “You don’t have to go that far” felt awkward too. If Noeul genuinely enjoyed it, her words might embarrass him.
“My heart’s beating so fast,” Noeul said, placing a hand over his left chest.
“Are you scared?”
“Yeah. But I think it’s going to be fun… Should we grab a hot dog after this? My heart’s racing, so I should calm it down a bit.”
“Sure, let’s do that.” Jiwoo chuckled.
Watching him, it didn’t seem like he was worn out just from keeping up with her.
Yeah, Noeul must be having fun too. After all, it was his idea to come to the amusement park. Jiwoo decided not to overthink it.
Finally, it was Jiwoo and Noeul’s turn. They boarded the Viking ride, the safety bar came down, and it started moving.
Jiwoo clutched Noeul’s arm tightly and screamed. Every time the ride reached the peak, she buried her face in his arm. She could feel his thick, firm muscles, and there was a scent that seemed a mix of fabric softener and his natural smell. Being there like that, it felt just like going to an amusement park with a boyfriend.
As the ride’s angle slowly leveled out, it finally came to a complete stop, and the safety bar lifted. Even amidst her fluster, Jiwoo hurried to straighten her hair.
“Wow, that was scarier than I thought!” she exclaimed.
“Uh…”
But Noeul’s expression wasn’t normal. His face was pale, and his features were tense. Jiwoo asked,
“You okay?”
“Uh… wow, that really went high… I need to… use the bathroom for a sec.”
Without even looking at her, Noeul dashed off to the restroom. Jiwoo waited outside. After a while, he came out, still looking unwell.
“You okay?” Jiwoo asked.
“Yeah. It’s been a while since I rode… my stomach got a bit… but I’m fine now.”
Though he said he was fine, his lips were still bluish, and he didn’t look well at all.
“What should we ride next?” Noeul asked.
“Are you really okay? Let’s sit down for a bit.”
“No, it’s fine. We’d be waiting in line anyway, so we can rest then.”
“I think you should sit for a bit.”
“No, I’m fine.”
Noeul insisted he was okay and suggested either going to another ride or watching the parade.
Jiwoo felt conflicted. He didn’t seem okay, but he kept saying he was. Maybe he really wanted to ride the attractions, or maybe he didn’t want to inconvenience her.
Then Jiwoo noticed sweat on Noeul’s forehead.
Sweating in December…?
Looking closer, there was sweat trickling down his neck too. Jiwoo gently wiped the back of Noeul’s neck with her hand.
“Hey, you’re sweating,” she said, showing him her palm.
“Why are you showing your hand… gross…”
“No, I think it’s cold sweat.”
“…Really? No, I’m just hot from wearing my padded jacket.”
“Nope. Your neck is cold.”
Jiwoo held his cheek with one hand and his hand with the other.
“See? You’re not feeling well right now.”
“….”
Seeing that, Noeul didn’t argue further.
“Let’s sit over there for now. No one’s chasing us,” Jiwoo said, pulling Noeul toward a bench.
He followed her without resistance, and they sat down.
“Want me to get something to drink?” Jiwoo asked.
“No, I’m fine. I’ll stay here.” Noeul still looked awful.
Jiwoo rubbed his back gently.
“Did you throw up in the bathroom earlier?”
“….”
“Huh?”
“Yes.”
“Oh… then why did you still want to go on rides?”
“….”
“Let’s sit here for a while until you feel better, then we can go home.”
“….”
Noeul didn’t reply. Jiwoo asked again,
“Are you feeling that bad?”
He shook his head and said,
“Sorry. You couldn’t enjoy it because of me…”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s way more important that you don’t overdo it.”
“….”
Jiwoo stopped rubbing Noeul’s back.
Why does he look so deflated? He looked like someone called into the manager’s office for poor performance.
For a moment, Jiwoo remembered Noeul joking and teasing all day, then remembered how he didn’t like crowded places.
Jiwoo patted him again and said,
“You’re not good with rides, are you? You don’t really like them, right?”
“…Not really, but… I just wasn’t feeling well today.”
“Then why didn’t you say anything?”
“…It wasn’t bad enough to complain about.”
“But you knew you weren’t feeling well. So why did you keep wanting to ride?”
“…I wanted to have a fun time with you.”
“You have to be feeling good for it to be fun for both of us.”
“I did have fun.” Noeul looked at Jiwoo’s expression and added, “Really.”
Jiwoo wasn’t sure how much to believe. She wanted to trust him, but something felt off.
“You don’t like crowded, noisy places, right?” she asked.
“…Not really, but… if I’m with you, everything’s fine.”
Even that made Jiwoo happy, but then she realized—this meant he came for her sake, not because he wanted to.
Jiwoo said,
“I like being with you too, but it should be fun for both of us. At least one person shouldn’t be doing something they dislike.”
“I’m not unhappy.”
“But wouldn’t you prefer a comic café or a quiet park?”
“…That’s true… but we can’t only go to places I like.”
“I like comic cafés too. Quiet parks too.”
“Then you’re just going along with me.”
“No…” Jiwoo struggled to explain. “It’s not just going along. I like it too. We’re both doing something we enjoy. How is that just going along?”
Noeul spoke after a pause,
“…You want to go to busy, exciting places. You said so when you were with the kids.”
“No… that’s…”
Jiwoo froze. How did he know that? Now she understood why Noeul suddenly wanted to go to the amusement park, why he insisted on going on ride after ride even when he was feeling bad.
She didn’t know how to explain. What she had said was true, but… it wasn’t meant that way!
“No, it’s just… sometimes I feel that way. With you, I just want to have fun together… That’s all. As long as we’re both comfortable and having fun, that’s good enough.”
…What is Jiwoo even saying?
She bit her lip. Noeul stared blankly at her.
Sigh…
Noeul sat in the back seat of the taxi, blinking. His body and mind were exhausted. He was in no state to take public transportation. Riding attractions he couldn’t handle had upset his stomach and ruined his mood. “Shaken up” must be exactly what this felt like.
“If only I hadn’t gotten motion sickness…”
If only that had happened, the date would have been a success. Until then, Jiwoo had believed Noeul genuinely enjoyed himself. But he got motion sick… Maybe he should’ve taken medicine beforehand.
“Phew…”
Noeul exhaled deeply.
But what could he do? He couldn’t control his own body. It couldn’t be helped. The past couldn’t be undone.
What now? Jiwoo might think Noeul couldn’t share things she liked. It was humiliating to be caught pretending otherwise.
Would she be disappointed in him? Think he’s unattractive and can’t even meet her interests? Think there’s no reason to date him?
Noeul shook his head. No, she wouldn’t think that. Jiwoo said it’s best to do things they both enjoy. Whether true or not, that meant she still liked him. She might be disappointed today, but she wouldn’t reconsider the relationship.
…At least for now. But if this keeps happening… if thoughts like today’s repeat…
Buzz—
A message from Jiwoo arrived.
[Jiwoo: Next time, let’s go to a comic café]
[Jiwoo: A place that’s fun for both of us hehe]
Noeul stared at the message.
Jiwoo was considerate, trying to match Noeul. She said she wanted to go, but… did she really mean it? Would Jiwoo genuinely enjoy sitting in a comic café reading comics? That’s more for someone like Noeul, who doesn’t like socializing.
Noeul dropped the phone onto the seat.
Suddenly, he wondered if dating like this was right. To date Jiwoo, one person would always have to compromise. Both couldn’t always have fun. That meant one side would always sacrifice something… is that really okay?
“….”
Noeul gazed out the window. He saw a sign that said ‘Jonghwaru,’ probably a Chinese restaurant. It reminded him of drinking sorghum liquor with Hansol at a Chinese restaurant.
Noeul picked up his phone again. The chat with Hansol appeared. He opened it, checked the profile, and stared at the “Call” button.
[Han Noeul]
He remembered Hansol had named his cat in Happy Farm after him.
“….”
Noeul put the phone down.
Buzz—
His phone rang. He checked it.
[Hansol: Life’s really boring]
Noeul smirked briefly, then his expression turned serious. He stared at Hansol’s message, hesitated, then typed:
[Noeul: Want to grab a drink?]
