[CHAPTER 86]
I must be crazy.
I completely lost it and cried my eyes out while Sian tried to comfort me.
I could not even remember the last time I had cried this hard.
And of all people, it had to be in front of Sian.
I did not know whether it was relief that Sian was not angry at me, or guilt over deceiving him.
No matter how much Sian said it was fine, deception was still deception.
It felt embarrassing to lift my face from where it was buried in his arms, even though enough time had passed.
I must have been a complete mess from crying so much.
Sian’s clothes were probably soaked with my tears too.
And those were knight order uniforms at that…
“Sir Sian.”
“Yes.”
“…I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
Once I got that far in my thoughts, I could not help but apologize again.
Whether he knew what I was apologizing for or not, Sian answered immediately that it was fine, then gently separated me from his embrace and softly brushed the corners of my eyes with his fingertips.
“It was simply my misunderstanding.”
“So there is nothing for you to apologize for.”
Ah, so that was it after all.
I lightly shook my head at Sian’s words.
“But I knew and still let it continue.”
“That means I deceived you.”
“Hmm…”
Perhaps because my tone was firm, or because I was right, Sian could no longer deny it.
Seeing that, I let out a small laugh.
If he wanted to comfort me, he could have insisted it was not true until the end.
To think a day would come when that rigid personality of his would look cute to me.
With a faint smile on my lips, I gently pressed my burning eyes with the back of my hand.
“But you really had no idea at all?”
“Yes.”
Sian nodded without hesitation in response to my question.
“No.”
“…And I was not indifferent.”
Was that so?
No matter how I looked at it, he seemed completely calm to me.
“…More importantly, what do you plan to do now?”
“Well, I was just thinking about that.”
At Sian’s question, I spoke with a heavy heart.
“I think I should go to the demon realm.”
“You cannot.”
That much I had expected.
I knew he would stop me.
But this time, I could not back down either.
It was not just me being targeted anymore.
The humans who were with me had nearly been dragged into it as well.
This time, Sian had been there, and the demon was one he could defeat without difficulty, so it ended without anyone getting hurt.
It had only been good luck.
If a stronger demon came next time, who knew what would happen then.
I gave a bitter smile.
“Sir Sian, you know that.”
His brows, set firmly as if he would not listen to anything I said, twitched slightly.
Sian knew it too.
That this was no longer just my problem.
That anyone could get caught up in it at any time.
Given Sian’s personality, always thinking about people’s safety, he could not help but consider those things.
This should be enough for him to understand.
No matter how strong his sense of responsibility toward me was, it could not outweigh the lives of countless people.
Sian covered half his face with his hand, looking troubled.
“…Even so, you cannot.”
“I will find a way somehow…”
His words, spoken with his eyes tightly shut, were filled with responsibility toward me, as expected.
“For now, you should hide, or rather…”
“Just stay by my side.”
Was this how he felt earlier, when I had been panicking?
“Sir Sian, Sir Sian.”
I gently took hold of his wrist.
This situation was the complete opposite of just moments ago, when Sian had been comforting me.
Sian worrying about me might have been only natural.
Before he saw this power, that was.
Right in front of Sian, I revealed the magic power I had been hiding.
The very magic I had slowly been recovering and concealing all this time.
Now that I had revealed myself as the Demon King, there was no reason to hold back.
And showing my strength would be the fastest way to put Sian at ease.
It was still weaker than my original power, but it was more than enough to protect myself without difficulty.
“……”
Sian, who had been rubbing his face with a troubled expression, suddenly lifted his head as he sensed my magic power.
The magic I no longer hid must have been palpable to him.
“You… are truly strong.”
Sian spoke with disbelief.
I could not blame him for reacting that way.
How many times had I collapsed and coughed up blood in front of him until now…
It would be stranger to think I was strong.
“I can protect myself.”
“And Illay is in the demon realm right now too.”
“…Ah.”
His expression, which had loosened in surprise, briefly hardened.
But only for a moment.
Huh?
Had I imagined it?
I only blinked once, and Sian’s expression had already returned to normal.
“So I will go and…”
…Go and what?
The moment my words trailed off, my mind felt like it had hit a wall.
Go and do what?
Set things straight and come back?
Is there even a reason to come back?
I did not need to return just to meet the World Tree.
After all, Ifrit and Noah said they could summon me anytime.
The Spirit Kings might scold me a little for showing up reeking of demonic energy if I came straight from the demon realm, but still.
From what I had seen, the World Tree did not seem like it would say much to me.
Then did I really have a reason to return?
……
I thought about it briefly, but could not find an easy answer.
Without saying anything, I opened the door leading to the demon realm.
The Demon King’s unique authority.
The one I could not activate while I had lost my magic power now activated as naturally as if nothing had ever happened.
Whoosh.
A fierce wind blew from the pressure difference, sending my hair flying.
Looking into the pitch-black interior of the gate, I spoke to Sian.
“I will go and… take care of things.”
“So that the human realm will not suffer because of me.”
The words I finally spoke after hesitating were unbearably vague.
I could not casually say that I would return.
There was no longer a justification for me to remain in the human realm, by Sian’s side.
The sense of responsibility Sian felt toward me must have faded significantly as well.
To begin with, he had felt responsible because he believed I became a demon after saving him.
That premise itself was completely wrong.
On top of that, I was not just any demon, but the Demon King.
I was never someone Sian needed to worry about.
If anything, it was fortunate that he was not drawing his sword against me right now.
I quietly waited for Sian’s response.
After pondering in silence for a long while, Sian finally spoke.
“You did not say that you would return.”
“……”
I had deliberately spoken vaguely, yet he struck right at the heart of it.
“Promise me.”
“What?”
“That you will definitely come back.”
His tone was calm, but his voice was trembling.
Why was he so tense over something like this?
“Even though I am the Demon King?”
“Does becoming the Demon King create an obligation to remain in the demon realm?”
I could not answer Sian’s question easily.
Among the previous Demon Kings, there were those who left everything to their subordinates and abandoned the demon realm entirely to live in indulgence.
I had done that myself in a past life.
Now that I had finally become honest, I could not bring myself to lie again.
I slowly opened my mouth.
“Not exactly, but…”
“Then what is the problem?”
“……”
“I am afraid.”
At my answer, Sian closed his mouth.
It seemed he was waiting for me to continue.
“I am the Demon King.”
“Sir Sian, I am not someone you are meant to protect, but someone you are meant to defeat.”
“If people find out that someone like me is staying by your side, what will happen to your honor?”
The very words I never wanted to say out loud.
Having to speak them myself wounded my pride.
That I was of no help to him at all.
That staying together would only bring harm.
When I squeezed my eyes shut from how painful it was to say, I suddenly felt warmth in my hand.
Sian had taken hold of my hand again.
“Sir Sian?”
“Jerena.”
“To me, you are simply Jerena.”
“……”
“So you must come back.”
Sian’s expression was resolute.
So much so that I nodded without realizing it.
“If you do not, I might go looking for you again.”
With that, he let out a hearty laugh.
It was a pleasant smile, but I did not feel like laughing along.
I already knew far too well how recklessly he would charge in once he made up his mind.
“All right.”
“I promise.”
A Holy Knight Commander marching into the demon realm alone.
I would rather not encounter that sight a second time.
“Then I’ll be back.”
At least I was glad I could say that much.
Just as I was about to step through the gate to the demon realm, Sian grabbed my wrist.
