Chapter 32
Who Am I, Where Is This (3)
Vizen’s violet eyes welled up with tears.
He looked more pitiful than a stray puppy.
“Is it important that I’m the real one? Or are you just desperate to have me again like before?”
I placed my hand over my chest and asked.
Vizen didn’t answer any of the questions.
Or rather, maybe he simply couldn’t answer them.
He must be confused too.
“Oppa.”
“…”
“I’m just where I’m supposed to be.”
“…That’s always been by my side.”
“You’re wrong.”
Vizen’s shoulders visibly trembled as he bowed his head.
“I’ve always just returned home.”
“Urgh…”
I met his gaze as he sniffled and trembled.
His already bloodshot violet eyes were even redder now.
“In the morning, I’d greet Lucy and Annie, eat breakfast while listening to Archon’s lectures, and run through the halls while getting scolded by Stra.”
“…I-I know.”
Vizen said, swallowing back his sniffles.
“After breakfast, when I started feeling sleepy, His Highness would come and bother me, and eventually, even Rudolph would show up.”
“Bothering, huh—”
“When I’d try to escape to the office, you’d grumble with me too.”
Vizen, covering his face with one hand, nodded slowly.
“That’s where I belong. That’s what Odelia always wished for.”
“…”
“Whether I’m real or fake, can’t you just believe me?”
I gently pulled down Vizen’s hand and asked.
His eyes seemed to say: Why? Why should I?
If he asked that, as someone who isn’t truly her, I wouldn’t have much to say.
But if Odelia, who shares even half of his blood, were here—she would have a lot to say.
“Even if it’s just half, we’re the only family left in this world.”
Because we’re family.
Even when kidnapped, even when locked up, even when thinking everything was discovered—because of family, she tried to return.
To me, it was just a fleeting connection. But to Odelia, he’s the last living blood relative, even if it meant dying.
Hate is a fleeting and exhausting emotion, one that fades with time.
What Odelia would need when she returns is not temporary hatred, but a space where she can settle down comfortably.
That’s what family is.
Sometimes family wears the name friend, or rival, or lover.
With all those names, we stay by each other’s sides, protect one another, and offer comfort. That’s what gives people a reason to live.
Just like my siblings did in my previous life.
As Vizen quietly listened to my words, he finally asked.
“So, who are you really?”
“Odelia.”
Yes, for Vizen right now, it’s enough that I’m Odelia.
Even for the real Odelia who will one day return, this version was better.
When the real one comes back, I’ll disappear without leaving a single trace.
So for now, let me be Odelia, and let him be Vizen. A sister and brother. The last family remaining in this world.
Because I don’t belong here.
I reached out and took Vizen’s hand, forgetting the racing heart I had just moments ago.
This is the world of a novel.
And I, in reality, do not belong here.
So I must forget. The bonds I make here, the memories too.
My only goals are Odelia’s happiness, and my own peace.
✦✦✦
So the turbulent day passed, and early morning arrived.
Maybe because of yesterday’s aftermath, I couldn’t fall asleep easily and woke up earlier than usual.
It was too early for Lucy or Annie to show up, so I sat there, unsure of what to do, when someone knocked on the door.
“Did you sleep well?”
It was Vizen.
He wore his usual simple outfit—dark pants with a navy shirt.
Come to think of it, it had been a while since he came to my room this early in the morning.
Ever since Ian started visiting and the Magic Tower business came up, Vizen had been busier, so I mostly only saw him during breakfast.
Unlike the time he burst in uninvited, this time he hesitated awkwardly, which was… a nice change.
“No, I didn’t sleep well.”
“…I see.”
I said it with a teasing smile, but he just gave a curt reply and looked away.
Honestly, it was a bit annoying to see him act so shy in that body.
A sibling quarrel isn’t supposed to be like cutting water with a knife—we fight, and then we go back to normal, right?
I let out a short sigh, and Vizen flinched noticeably.
If only one of us had thrown a punch yesterday, it wouldn’t be this awkward.
…Should I hit him now—?
I thought about it but gave up.
Vizen needed time to get used to it too.
“I’m hungry.”
“Right, I had breakfast prepared. Clothes—”
“It’s fine. It’s not like this is the first or second time I’m eating in my pajamas.”
Vizen nodded like he completely agreed.
Having lived my whole life as a modern person, I still couldn’t get used to the idea of constantly changing clothes.
Change in the morning, change again for tea time, then again for dinner, and yet again for bed.
Add in some party or event, and it’s more changes.
I am never attending a party.
Stretching lightly, I held out my hand to Vizen.
When he saw it, he burst into laughter.
Thankfully, he remembered.
The first day we met, we went to the dining room holding hands like this.
It was a sudden situation combined with hunger that caused me to do it back then—but thanks to that, I learned quite a bit.
“It’s been a while, huh?”
“Yeah, it has.”
The awkward Vizen chuckled at the memory.
It seemed to be a special memory for him too.
“Come on, hand.”
“Haha—alright.”
Vizen placed his hand over mine.
His rough, calloused hand on top of my small, delicate one made for a funny scene, but it wasn’t bad.
Vizen also sounded more relaxed.
“Do I still seem like a dog this time?”
He asked, recalling what I said the day we met.
“Yeah, like a scared puppy. You don’t like that?”
“No, I do.”
He smiled, squeezing my hand like he was grateful.
Yes, let’s keep things like this.
I hope the real Odelia can say the same when she returns.
I might not get to see how sweet their sibling bond becomes—but just thinking they’ll be happy made me feel at peace.
“What’s for breakfast?”
“Steak?”
“What the—meat in the morning? Make it Cajun chicken tender salad at least!”
“…Isn’t that still meat?”
“Vegetables!”
Laughing over nonsense, we walked toward the dining room.
Unlike before, there was no scent of blood or forcefulness—just a peaceful path.
✦✦✦
“Welcome.”
When we arrived at the dining hall, a familiar guest was waiting.
Vizen clearly didn’t know he’d be here either, judging by the sour look he gave him.
Of course. I was shocked too.
“…Your Highness.”
Sitting at the table, smiling brightly with golden hair tucked behind his ear, was none other than Ian.
You bastard, you already ate breakfast before us?
Smile all you want—it won’t work. You think that face of yours is going to fool me?
“Odelia!”
“Your Majesty, may I ask why you’re here?”
“Why of course! I finished all my pending work and came right over!”
“What a shame. I wish you had more work.”
I clicked my tongue, ignoring his hopeful smile like he was begging for praise.
Honestly, crashing someone’s breakfast like this is just excessive.
“Did you need something?”
“You seem particularly grumpy today. Did something happen?”
From Ian’s point of view—having no idea what happened over the last two days—my grumpiness probably seemed strange.
Should I be a bit nicer today? I glanced over at him.
He looked like a giant golden retriever, staring at me expectantly.
If he were a real dog, I might’ve patted him for being cute. But unfortunately, Ian was human.
“My grumpy attitude is part of my identity. Besides, isn’t it weird you’re visiting me this early?”
“I felt I hadn’t seen you in too long.”
“Even so, this early in the morning is too much.”
I took a sip of the warm coffee and folded my arms.
Ian lowered his eyes with a sulky expression.
With that sculpted face, the sorrow made him look heartbreakingly beautiful.
His face is so unfair. You can’t live off just a pretty face—but he probably could.
Not that I’m trying to live off it or anything.
“Don’t act pitiful. You’re not.”
I shot him down coldly, hoping to shake him out of it.
Let’s act like real adults today.
Don’t look at me like that, man. That’s not how we do it.
Seeing that I wasn’t falling for it, Ian visibly gave up on the act.
…So it was an act, huh?
Should’ve known.
“The maids usually fall for that, but I see you’re built different.”
“Stop practicing on the poor maids. What did they ever do to deserve that?”
“Don’t you know seeing this face is a blessing?”
I silently mouthed bullshit and turned away.
Self-praise is only charming up to a point.
He should really think about why people resent pretty faces who act like this.
True beauty is pretty and humble.
Someone like Odelia, for example.
As I sipped my tea, Vizen finally couldn’t take it anymore and opened his mouth.
“Your Highness, is there any particular reason for your early visit?”
“Oh, the Marquess was here too?”
Ian feigned surprise like he hadn’t seen him.
Classic ‘Oh my, you were here too?’ sarcasm.
“I clearly requested that you inform me before your next visit.”
“Who dares predict a royal’s steps? By the way, Marquess—don’t you have work?”
“Seems like you have more work than me. I’ll send some new documents before noon—please take care of them.”
“Two’s company, not fun. You do it alone.”
What a childish exchange.
‘Wait, haven’t I seen this scene before?’
Before I could finish the thought, a pale hand touched my shoulder.
“Good morning, Jin—Odelia.”
Rudolph’s lips curled into a strange shape, almost saying Jinah, then rounding back to Odelia.
Thanks to that, both Vizen and Ian turned to us.
Looks like another peaceful breakfast just flew out the window.
“So, what brings you here this early?”
“I just really wanted to see Jin—Odelia.”
You punk. You’re not even trying to keep it secret, huh?
Is this really the genius master of the Magic Tower forgetting someone’s name?
My neck started to ache.
Is there a memory-erasing spell somewhere? Where’s a wand when you need one? Obliviate, dammit!
