Chapter 53
This time, unlike before, I didn’t pull away when our lips met.
The moment his soft tongue touched my lips, I wanted to pull back, but his hand gripped the back of my neck tightly, holding my head firmly in place, leaving me no escape.
I closed my eyes gently and parted my lips slightly, and through that gap, his soft flesh slipped inside.
Chester’s breath rushing into my mouth was scorching hot, yet sweet like candy.
The flesh that pressed in skillfully explored my mouth and gently entwined my stiff tongue, pushing in his saliva.
When my body wobbled, Chester held my waist tightly, pushing further into my mouth.
Our tangled tongues untwined, and as cool air entered, his lips finally parted.
“Hah… Chester.”
His forehead rested against mine.
“Yulia, I have so many questions about you.”
“You’re curious about me?”
“Yes. I want to know you.”
“……”
“I want to know why you’ve been in pain. What has tormented you… Can you tell me?”
I studied Chester’s eyes, which were very close to mine. They were full of curiosity directed at me.
I hesitated. Even if he learned the truth of that day, would his feelings toward me be more pity or compassion than love?
I wanted his love—but I feared the truth might only become his sorrow.
I squeezed my eyes shut.
“I’m not forcing you. I’ll wait until you can tell me.”
“…I’ll tell you… just a little.”
I couldn’t recount everything from that day; my mind wouldn’t handle it. But Chester had the right to know a little.
“You absolutely… must not pity me or feel sorry for me.”
“Yes. I will love you without pity or sympathy, Yulia.”
“Follow me.”
I grasped Chester’s hand tightly and moved to a place that, while familiar, now felt foreign.
A palace I hadn’t been near for over ten years, now little more than ruins—a place that held the horrors of my childhood.
A palace closed and abandoned, containing the shameful history of this imperial family that could never be revealed.
“Yulia? This place…”
“It’s the palace where I lived as a child. Compared to where I live now… it wasn’t grand or large.”
“More than that—”
“I was never a beloved princess from the start, Chester.”
Looking around, even the garden had been neglected. The interior likely looked no better.
If I were alone, I would never have come here. But with Chester, I felt safe enough to breathe.
Despite being outside, the air felt heavy. Memories of the past played tricks on me.
“I was the target of everyone’s resentment. At one point, I hated myself too. I thought being born was a sin.”
“Yulia.”
“I don’t have many memories of my mother. My nanny felt more like a mother to me.”
“……”
“After my mother passed… I lived as her replacement.”
My nanny had been like a true mother to me, but her feelings came more from pity and sympathy than maternal love.
Having lost my mother young, with a face identical to hers, I became her substitute.
A weak child without power lost her identity under the weight of authority but swayed by warmth rather than resentment.
“I rebelled only once. After that, this palace was closed, and I was granted a new one.”
“……”
“And the palace I live in now is the one I was granted back then…”
I couldn’t continue speaking. Chester simply held me tightly, yet somehow my sorrow rose.
His embrace was so warm that my heart began to calm. He whispered softly in my ear.
“Yulia, don’t say any more. And don’t dwell on it.”
“…Chester.”
I wrapped my arms around his waist, feeling comforted by him.
Chester’s gentle voice helped me sort out my restless, tangled emotions. I closed my eyes and savored his warmth.
He patted my back.
“I won’t make you anxious.”
“…You won’t call off the engagement?”
“Why would I?”
“Weren’t you disappointed in me for overreacting over something so small?”
“To you, it wasn’t small.”
I felt comforted. I wanted to indulge in this warmth.
I hadn’t told Chester everything yet. Revisiting those memories was too much for me.
That day, a mix of paradise and hell, was a memory I never wanted to recall.
“And more than anything, Yulia, your past will never change my love for you.”
“……”
“I understand why you doubted my sincerity. I will try as much as you share yourself with me.”
“Try at what?”
“I will actively express my feelings so you won’t be anxious.”
Why did his words make me feel uneasy?
Despite my worries, Chester whispered sweetly in his soft voice.
“If you want, I can whisper ‘I love you’ hundreds, even thousands of times into your ear.”
“…Then say it now.”
“I love you, Yulia.”
“…Me too.”
Chester became my stabilizer, and simultaneously, my laughter.
After washing, wearing a light chemise, I stepped onto the balcony. The cold night breeze brushed my skin, a pleasant sensation.
I gazed blankly at the moon. Suddenly, someone draped a blanket over my shoulders and hugged me from behind.
I didn’t need to turn—there was only one person who would do this—and I relaxed into his strong embrace.
“Hah… Yulia, what would you do if someone else did this?”
“Only Chester would act this way with me.”
“It would still be dangerous if it were me.”
“Why dangerous?”
“Because now isn’t the time to let go; otherwise, it wouldn’t be dangerous at all.”
Chester holding me like this felt incredibly romantic. I felt as if I owned him.
“Yulia, don’t wear thin clothes in the cold.”
“Why?”
“You’ll catch a cold.”
“If I wear thin clothes, you can just keep me warm.”
Chester let out a short laugh.
“To do that, I’ll have to stay close to you.”
“Chester.”
“Yes?”
“I only want one thing. I want your love to be true.”
“You can ask for more, Yulia.”
I shook my head at his words.
It no longer mattered to me whether Chester was the villain in the original story. I had decided to love him, regardless of what kind of person he was.
As long as he didn’t kill my family and his feelings for me were sincere, I could handle anything.
Even if he were crueler than in the original story, I was confident that this fluttering feeling in my heart wouldn’t change.
I wondered if the original Yulia obsessed over Chester because of this same soft, fluffy feeling.
After acknowledging my feelings, a worry arose—would things follow the original story? Because in the original, Yulia’s love for Chester ended tragically.
“You may desire anything you want. I will gladly give you whatever you wish.”
“Really? But all I want is you, Chester.”
“I am already yours, Yulia.”
Chester’s tenderness, his sweet, warm affection, became my stability and happiness.
My past with my father and brother was just the past. I hoped they were no longer shackled by guilt because of me.
I had forgiven their sins.
So, I wanted my loved ones to be happy and free from suffering because of me.
And now, what I wanted most was… my happiness.
“Chester.”
“Yes?”
“Let’s sleep together. Since we’re sleeping anyway, sleep next to me.”
“Yulia…”
“Uh… is that a problem?”
“Why would it be?”
Chester’s lips brushed my neck. His display of affection felt good, yet ticklish.
“Chester, isn’t the moon beautiful?”
“Perhaps. I don’t know. To me, you are the most beautiful.”
His words made my face flush. Luckily, the moonlight hid my burning cheeks from Chester.
How could he always say things so sweetly? I couldn’t help loving him.
“Let’s go inside.”
Chester quickly opened the balcony door.
Inside, I removed the blanket, and Chester took it to tidy up.
Already in my chemise, I climbed into bed and snuggled under the covers.
“Chester, come quickly!”
“Yes, right away.”
He laughed softly, came to bed, and lay down beside me.
I rolled over and pressed against him, holding him tightly, feeling his warmth, and closed my eyes.
Resting my head on the soft pillow, sleep came as usual.
