Chapter 52
“Pawned Life”
“There’s nothing.”
Books piled up beside Irina, and Casey kept bringing more and then taking them away again and again.
“Madam, I brought some new books.”
“Nothing here either.”
Irina’s hands turned the pages faster and faster.
“Here’s another stack.”
“Nothing here either.”
Everything was completely unrelated.
Irina let out a sigh.
Casey, who had brought the ninth stack of books and sat beside her, tilted her head.
“Casey, this isn’t working. Let’s take a little break.”
“Okay— then should I leave these here? Or put them back?”
“Mm, let’s put them away later. For now, sit down and rest a bit. You’ve been moving around nonstop.”
“Oh, I’m fine.”
Still, perhaps she was tired — Casey sat down next to Irina, rubbing her arms.
Irina rested her chin on her hand and sighed deeply.
“What exactly are you looking for, Madam?”
“Well, it’s like…”
When Casey asked, Irina’s eyes darted around.
“Uh, something like the stories my mother used to tell me when I was little. You know those times when you suddenly want to find something from your childhood?”
“What kind of stories did she tell?”
“Well… Casey, have you ever heard a story like this? About someone who turned back time for the person they loved. Kind of childish, right?”
Irina scratched her head and laughed awkwardly.
“No! I like stories like that too. My mother was sick for a long time, so I grew up with my grandmother. She was a gypsy, so she used to tell me all sorts of mysterious stories.”
“Really?”
Encouraged by Casey’s agreement, Irina brightened.
“I’m looking for something like that. Something about the god of fate, maybe.”
“The god of fate? Hmm… I think I’ve heard a story like that before.”
“…Really?”
“Yes. But, um, I think it was kind of a sad story.”
“Sad?”
At that, Irina felt uneasy, though she knew it wasn’t her story.
“Yes, I think so.”
“So, it doesn’t have a happy ending?”
“Well, I guess that depends on who you ask.”
Casey gave a vague answer.
Indeed — what’s a happy ending for one person might be a tragic one for another, and vice versa.
“What kind of story was it? Tell me.”
“Well, it was a long, long time ago—”
Just then, a dull thud sounded from outside the door.
Startled, Irina and Casey both turned to look.
Soon, the heavy door opened.
“Madam, His Grace has returned.”
“Oh? Is it that late already? Casey, can you tell me the rest later?”
Irina stood up.
“Of course. Madam, I’ll clean up here before I go.”
“Would you? Thank you.”
The servant who brought the news came in to help Casey, while Irina stepped out to meet Howard.
As she hurried, she saw Howard stepping down from the carriage.
“Howard!”
Irina lifted her dress slightly and walked faster.
Howard, who was just taking off his gloves, turned at the sound of her voice.
“You didn’t have to rush like that.”
“You’re home — how could I not?”
As she spoke, she came to stand in front of him.
Howard reached out and gently cupped her cheeks in his warm hands.
“That’s a pleasant thing to hear.”
“Nothing happened today, right?”
“Nothing at all. What did you do today?”
“I played with Casey.”
“You must have enjoyed yourself.”
“Of course.”
Her smile made Howard’s lips curve up too.
He impulsively kissed her — first on the forehead, then on her eyelids, and finally the bridge of her nose.
The coachman, Werner, and the knights nearby awkwardly turned their bodies aside.
“Let’s go inside.”
“Mm.”
Tap, tap.
While Howard changed his clothes, Irina returned to her room.
Left alone, her thoughts drifted again.
The deeper she thought, the more unconsciously she bit her nails, staring blankly out the window.
Though her eyes were on the view, her mind replayed today’s meeting — and her conversation with Lurasa.
Then, old memories too.
So much that she didn’t even notice Howard coming in until he wrapped his arms around her from behind, startling her.
“When did you get here? You should’ve said something.”
“I called you twice.”
“Oh… really? I didn’t hear.”
“What were you thinking about this time?”
“Well, Lurasa and Damian came by today. Having both of them here at once was exhausting.”
Howard brushed her soft cheek with his hand, looking understanding.
“I’ll forbid anyone from entering the mansion starting tomorrow.”
“No!”
He had only said it for her comfort, but Irina’s firm refusal made him raise an eyebrow.
“I mean… they’re noisy, but it’s not like they’re bad people.”
“Something’s bothering you, isn’t it?”
“Mm, honestly, I’m still a bit uneasy.”
Irina leaned her face into his hand.
When she had opened Kisie’s coffin, thankfully, he hadn’t awakened from his seal.
Lurasa had checked the seal once more, just in case.
But that hadn’t completely eased Irina’s anxiety.
They couldn’t just move a sealed being carelessly either.
All she could do was trust Howard.
“You won’t get hurt.”
Howard reassured her again.
But Irina’s unease wasn’t only about that.
“What about you?”
Because reassurance had to go both ways.
“Don’t worry about me either.”
“Truly?”
Howard nodded.
Hearing that, Irina stepped out of his arms and headed for the door.
“Then let’s go eat dinner. I haven’t eaten yet. You didn’t eat already, did you?”
Even if you did, you’re eating again with me — her outstretched hand seemed to say.
Howard took her hand without hesitation.
Irina led him out of the room.
As she hummed softly while walking, the servants who saw her couldn’t help but smile warmly.
When Irina had been unconscious, the ducal mansion had been silent — oppressively so.
The servants worked in silence, and those who were close to Irina sighed constantly.
Worried that any noise might harm her health, they cleaned more meticulously than ever.
But that gloomy cloud lifted completely once Irina rose from her bed.
When she and Howard entered the dining hall, the kitchen staff were busily setting dishes on the table.
Irina didn’t eat much, but the head chef always insisted on filling the entire table.
Tonight was no exception — in fact, it was probably twice as full as usual.
“At this rate, we’ll go bankrupt,” Howard joked as he pulled out her chair.
The chef, who was just placing the last main dish, gave a confident smile.
“Madam, impossible! Even if we gathered all the people of Bormann and held a festival for a year, we’d still have plenty left!”
“That’s a relief — but if we did that, your arms wouldn’t survive.”
Irina teased, and the chef laughed heartily, flexing his arms.
“Ha ha ha! You’re right about that! I guess I’d better just stay here and cook for the Duke and Madam. I put in some extra care today — it’s easy on the stomach, even if you eat more than usual. You haven’t been eating well lately.”
He explained the dishes one by one as he garnished them right in front of her.
Irina looked down at the food.
The region was hotter than Arendor, so the cuisine tended to be rich and salty — something she still hadn’t fully adapted to.
Fortunately, everything here was prepared to suit her palate.
Recently, the meals had been made even lighter, so she could eat comfortably and digest well.
“I’m looking forward to this.”
Howard’s lips curved into a smile at her words — he seemed happier about her appetite than she was.
The chef placed a plate of sliced roasted goose closer to her.
Irina picked up her knife and fork and took a bite.
The goose, slow-cooked with its fat carefully rendered out, was tender and moist.
The orange-colored sauce was sweet, savory, and slightly tangy — perfectly complementing the meat.
Mashed beans, cooked together, added a pleasant texture when eaten together.
“Mmm, this is really good.”
“I’m so glad! Please eat plenty, Madam. I’ll make as much as you like, anytime.”
“This is more than enough. I might still be eating by nightfall at this rate.”
Her teasing made the chef laugh heartily again before he returned to the kitchen.
Even after he was gone, her plate didn’t stay empty.
Normally, a servant would assist at such times, but more often than not, it was Howard who personally handled it.
His composed, practiced movements left even the head butler speechless.
And though the servants were now used to it, they had been just as shocked the first time — at how naturally Irina accepted such treatment from her master.
“Howard, I’m done.”
The chef’s efforts had paid off — Irina had eaten half a plate more than usual.
At Howard’s gesture, a servant quickly cleared the table for dessert.
“Tomorrow evening, I’d like to spend some time alone with you.”
