Chapter 33
I’m Sad Too!
April 2, 2024
At those words, my eyes widened.
‘Right! Everyone thinks I’m in a coma!’
They felt warmth on the bed but didn’t see anyone there, so of course they assumed someone had moved me.
‘That’s the logical conclusion.’
But there was one problem.
“Nonsense. The opponent’s a Swordmaster. If he sensed us, do you really think he’d let us walk right into the house like this?”
Right—Cedar wasn’t just any swordsman.
‘That’s true. Cedar would’ve sensed them. He’s the kind of person who can read even the faintest shift of my breathing when I’m asleep inside the house.’
Then why hadn’t he sensed these two assassins?
‘Could it be… that he sensed them and chose not to act?’
Because, as I said earlier, it might be more beneficial for him if I died?
‘No way! That’s impossible.’
Just a few hours ago, I’d been praising him for being a good man—and now here I was thinking something so horrible.
I shook my head hard, trying to drive the thought away.
And then, my long hair brushed against the drawer, making a faint fluttering sound, like butterfly wings.
A normal person wouldn’t have noticed such a quiet sound—but the assassins about to leave my room froze instantly and turned their heads toward me.
“……!”
Their sharp gazes locked onto me with unerring precision.
They’d pinpointed my exact location just from that tiny noise.
‘I should’ve cut my hair like Cedar said!’
Who knew long hair could literally get you killed.
Watching the assassins approach, I bit my lip.
There was only one thing left for me to do.
‘Magic!’
If I could just spark even a flicker of flame like I had earlier when melting the lock, it would be enough to startle them and buy a few seconds.
But the moment I tried to gather magic—an excruciating pain clenched around my heart.
“Ugh!”
My mana-depleted heart screamed in protest. I clutched my chest tightly.
‘No! Earlier, when I used magic…’
The mana I’d spent so long gathering had all been used up melting that stupid lock!
My body temperature spiked, sweat beading across my forehead.
Even through the pain, I forced my eyes open and looked up at the assassins closing in.
Both were wrapped head to toe in black cloth, only their eyes visible. They looked more like ghosts than humans.
But ghosts wouldn’t have such murderous eyes.
“The Duchess was right. She really is alive.”
‘The Duchess!’
My eyes flew wide. There was only one person that title could refer to—
Cedar’s mother.
‘She’s the one who wants me dead?’
I had decided to stay in this sham marriage to avoid dying, and now I was going to die because of it?
The world seemed to turn white. One of the assassins raised his dagger.
“Then goodbye.”
I couldn’t even rewind time now—my mana was completely gone!
I stared blankly at the silver blade coming toward me, clutching my aching heart, when—
A low, heavy voice rumbled from behind me, thick as fog rolling over a swamp.
“How dare a rat sneak into my house.”
The assassins didn’t even have time to turn.
A massive hand seized one of them by the nape and yanked him back into the darkness.
There was a sharp crack, something breaking, then slam!—the door shut hard.
It all happened in an instant.
I blinked rapidly, then awkwardly pushed myself upright.
“Cedar?”
That voice—it was his, wasn’t it?
‘Unless… it wasn’t him.’
Were the assassins pretending, trying to lure me outside?
My mind spiraled with paranoia, but the room was too dark to see clearly.
‘If only I could make a little light.’
Lighting a flame wasn’t a difficult spell. Back in the library, I’d always surrounded myself with little floating orbs of light.
That was—until now.
“Ahh!”
The moment I tried to use magic again, agony surged through my chest. I curled up tightly like a pill bug, tears prickling in my eyes.
But more than the pain, what hurt most was the frustration.
‘I can’t even cast something this simple anymore.’
Tears welled up and spilled over. I knew this wasn’t the time to cry, but I couldn’t hold it in.
Then—step, step—I heard familiar footsteps, followed by a warm hand gently brushing my face.
“Are you alright? Did you get cut?”
At that familiar voice, my tears flowed even harder. I choked out his name.
“Cedar…”
His hand, which had been touching my face, flinched faintly at my voice.
I couldn’t see his face at all in the darkness, but it didn’t seem to matter to him. He effortlessly lifted me into his arms just like before.
His broad hand patted my back gently, and a deep sense of relief flooded my chest.
“Sorry. I came too late.”
“…Hhk.”
I didn’t even have the strength to answer. The tears just came.
I clung to Cedar’s shoulder, squeezing my eyes shut.
I couldn’t even explain why I was crying.
Part of it was relief at surviving, part of it was the pent-up loneliness bursting out now that someone—anyone—I could lean on had finally appeared.
Cedar didn’t seem annoyed at all. He simply held me carefully, soothing me with quiet pats as he set me down on the bed.
A moment later, a warm shawl was draped over my shoulders. The door clicked shut, and a soft lamp was lit.
The assassins were gone as if they’d never existed. Cedar sat down in the chair beside my bed as naturally as if nothing had happened, placed the lamp on the nightstand, and reached toward me.
“Let me see.”
True to his impatient nature, his hand moved even before he finished speaking. His warm fingers grasped my foot.
He must have thought I was sitting on the floor earlier because I was hurt.
It was the first time anyone had ever held my foot like that, and my tears vanished instantly—replaced by a furious blush spreading to the tips of my ears.
I tried to pull away, stammering, “I-I’m fine! Nothing happened!”
“Nothing happened, yet you were crying like your heart broke?”
“Th-that’s because I was scared… and when I saw you, I relaxed all at once…”
Cedar didn’t believe me. He checked my hands, my forehead—meticulously, one by one.
He was so close I could hear his heartbeat.
But instead of his usual crisp forest scent, he smelled like fresh earth after rain—clean, warm, and grounding.
‘Like soil.’
His heart was pounding, too—he must’ve been scared. But strangely, breathing in his scent calmed my own heart almost instantly.
For the first time, I truly felt safe.
‘Come to think of it, my heart doesn’t hurt anymore.’
The stabbing pain that had wracked me since trying to cast magic had vanished.
‘But why? Nothing’s changed… so why does it no longer hurt?’
Puzzled, I blinked. What was different from when I’d been running from the assassins?
But I didn’t get to think long—because Cedar suddenly noticed my split lower lip.
I’d been biting it so much that it had cracked and was bleeding, making it look worse than it was.
Already on edge, Cedar panicked.
“Even if it hurts, hold still. Let me wipe the blood… I’m not sure if it’s safe to put ointment on your lips.”
Wouldn’t it be fine if I just licked it off since it’s medicine? I didn’t even know myself, so I couldn’t answer.
He took out a folded handkerchief and dabbed my lips.
I hadn’t realized I was bleeding, but in seconds, little red spots stained the cloth.
The blood wouldn’t stop even after several wipes, so Cedar pressed the fabric firmly to my lips.
But given the location, he couldn’t exactly apply much pressure without… well, awkwardness. His expression twisted helplessly.
After fumbling for a moment, he sighed heavily and muttered,
“Even if the house blew up, you should’ve used magic! You’re supposed to be an Archmage—how could you just sit there and let them attack? You’re too damn kind.”
Even if the house blew up?
I couldn’t stop a bitter laugh from escaping.
Sure—an Archmage could blow up a house with one spell.
If she were a normal, fully-functioning Archmage, that is.
“I wasn’t being kind.”
“What?”
“It’s not that I wanted to just sit there and take it…”
A wave of frustration rose in my throat. Once upon a time, I had been a true Archmage—capable of powerful spells.
Offensive magic hadn’t been my specialty, so I’d never literally blown up a building, but—
‘Every spell, every chant—I still remember them all!’
Dozens of incantations flashed through my mind.
If I only whispered a few trigger words, I could have activated several spells at once.
But now… I didn’t have the mana to cast even one.
“Ah!”
Once again, my heart twisted painfully, and a moan escaped my lips. The pain was so sharp I nearly blacked out.
Was I sitting or lying down?
‘My vision’s shaking…’
No—I’m shaking.
My body crumpled sideways like I was collapsing in slow motion.
Just before I hit the floor, Cedar caught me tightly in his arms.
“Nellie!”
That face—
‘It doesn’t suit you.’
Why did he look so desperate? It’s not like there was anything between us. He didn’t even have to feel sorry.
Though… since it was his mother behind this, maybe indirectly it was his fault.
‘But I don’t hate him. Weird.’
From the moment we met, he’d always been a strange man. Not once had he seemed ordinary.
As he held me, the crisp forest scent mixed with that earthy smell again, drifting around me.
‘Cool…’
His hands were warmer than mine, yet being in his arms felt as refreshing as a mouthful of mint.
The pain faded away, and all that remained was peace.
And then, I quietly fell asleep.
