Chapter 67
But there really wasn’t much I could tell her.
I twisted my body awkwardly and whispered,
“Kissing… was incredible.”
“…That’s it?”
“Yeah. This is something only people who’ve tried it understand.”
I winked, and Mei rolled her eyes.
Her face screamed I’m dying of jealousy, so I ignored her.
Now how am I supposed to face Alperen?
Using the excuse of “fake dating” didn’t work anymore.
Because the moment I realized my true feelings, I could no longer call it fake.
So, I decided on a deadline.
A week from now, I’d tell him our fake relationship was over.
Because it wasn’t right to go on pretending when my heart was already involved.
The truth was, this whole arrangement had only been Alperen’s way of avoiding unnecessary rumors until he found someone real.
It never would have happened if Nanael hadn’t misunderstood after the Tower incident.
That was all it was meant to be.
Keeping this vague, in-between thing going isn’t good for either of us.
I liked Alperen, sure. But to him, I was nothing more than his friend’s little sister.
If I confessed, he wouldn’t accept it. He’d just pull farther away.
If he’d ever liked me even a little, he wouldn’t have suggested fake dating in the first place.
And I—stupidly—I hadn’t thought he’d ever fall for me, so I went along with it.
That’s why I had to stop now, before my feelings grew even deeper.
Ending things would hurt less than dragging it out.
The only reason I hadn’t ended the contract right away… was my lingering attachment.
***
‘How about we go to the seaside in mid-July? Thanks to the Goddess of Victory, I got us a great vacation spot.’
When Alperen had brought up the idea of a holiday, I wavered.
At least one couple’s trip before ending things—wouldn’t that be nice?
But by mid-July, Summer would already be here.
So of course, it was impossible. But still, I didn’t turn him down.
***
‘Good. Let’s leave Adrian behind. He’d only get in the way.’
‘That’s a great idea, Deli.’
In that moment, I had meant it with all my heart.
Once I acknowledged my feelings, I suddenly found myself acting with frightening decisiveness.
Since the deadline was set, I wanted to use every bit of time I had left.
***
‘Shall we meet again tomorrow?’
‘Tomorrow too?’
‘Mm-hm. And the day after that. And the day after that, too. After work, before work—I don’t care. I just want to see your face every day.’
‘Funny, today it feels like you’re saying everything I wanted to say.’
It was nothing more than selfish indulgence on my part.
But Alperen, not knowing my heart, readily agreed to my suggestion that we go on dates every day for a week.
I hurried to make a bucket list.
One week wasn’t nearly enough to make all the memories I wanted before Summer arrived.
I wrote down all the places I’d always dreamed of going with a lover.
I even thought about buying couple items, but rejected the idea.
Because I knew I’d just cling to them pathetically later, unable to throw them away.
***
By the fifth day of my private farewell preparations, I made one last visit to the Ainrook estate.
Once the contract ends, I probably won’t be able to come here anymore, will I?
I’d grown attached in the past month, so it felt a little sad.
Thanks to Isaac and Sophia trusting me, the household had completely transformed.
The dreary, outdated furniture was all replaced. Even the staff was refreshed. There was nothing left to fix.
Now, even after Summer arrives, things should run smoothly on their own.
I’d left behind detailed guidelines for when I was gone. Sophia would handle it.
After wrapping up my last tasks, I headed for the annex.
Carrying an armful of lilies—Daven Ainrook’s favorite—I arrived just as the sun was setting.
I replaced the dried lilies with fresh ones.
Then I stood there, staring at Daven Ainrook for a long time.
If Alperen grew old, he might look like this.
Even if I end up as his “ex,” since it was all fake, maybe we could still go back to the way we were before.
But knowing Alperen, if things worked out with Summer, he would draw the line clearly.
And I—though I had no intention of clinging as some ambiguous “girl friend”—still felt a sting in my chest.
“Today’s my last goodbye. I probably won’t be back for a while.”
I whispered a farewell to the man who couldn’t hear me.
Come to think of it, Sierra would be delivering the fairy bloom soon.
If it blossomed and awakened a fairy as I wished, maybe it could help Daven.
I pushed down the selfish desire to use that as an excuse to see Alperen one more time.
As always, I prayed earnestly for Daven’s awakening.
* * *
Rodelia thought she had hidden it well. But Alperen had sensed it.
That she was somehow preparing for goodbye.
It began with Sophia’s casual remark.
***
‘Lately, Lady Rodelia’s been strange. She’s been leaving behind all these detailed records, almost like she doesn’t plan to visit Ainrook again for a while.’
Then Isaac, the gardener, and even Eden added their own observations.
***
‘She suddenly gave each of the servants personal gifts. Of course, we were grateful—but it felt strange. Almost like she was leaving on a long journey…’
‘Several packages arrived at the Tower in her name. Drip coffee bags from Winif, just launched! Enough for the whole year, I’d say.’
It was odd. Rodelia usually delighted in doing things herself.
But now she was showering everyone with gifts all at once.
Not just the gifts—her recent dates felt almost like she was checking items off a list.
***
‘Want to split this with me?’
‘Uh… I don’t really want to.’
And when he suggested buying couple items, she gave him an uneasy look.
All of it reminded him of lovers in a cooling relationship, preparing for a breakup.
He even recalled something he’d read in 101 Ways to Keep Love Alive.
Apparently, right before breaking up, a lover often showers you with kindness.
Breaking up?
Alperen didn’t want to believe it.
Hadn’t they already promised to spend the summer holiday together?
She had even suggested it herself, that they go just the two of them.
So surely, these little signs were just his imagination.
But there was one sign he couldn’t dismiss.
***
‘You know… once this fake dating ends, maybe it’d be more natural if we acted like we didn’t know each other for a while?’
‘Why are you suddenly saying something like that?’
‘Just… ordinary couples, when they break up, they act like they’ll never see each other again. I don’t want that with you. It’d be sad if we never saw each other…’
Why did she have to ask such ominous questions at the sweetest moment?
Alperen checked the calendar.
Tomorrow would be the final day of their promised week.
They’d planned to have brunch in the late morning, then attend Nanael’s tea party in the afternoon.
Don’t overthink it, he told himself. Pressing his temples hard, trying to chase away the unease.
‘Good. Let’s leave Adrian behind. He’d only get in the way.’
He reminded himself of her suggestion that they travel together, just the two of them.
A completely different kind of promise than the family vacations they’d shared in the past.
So it had to be just needless worrying.
That time too, wasn’t it Deli who asked me to go with her?
He remembered the year after the former Duke of Ainrook had fallen unconscious.
He had planned to skip summer vacation to work instead.
But Rodelia had stopped him.
‘What are you doing for vacation?’
‘Working.’
‘Excuse me, young Duke of Ainrook. Haven’t you heard of the basic rule that resting well helps you work better? No arguments—you’re coming with us on vacation.’
He had long ago realized it was her way of caring for him, who had no family to spend holidays with.
That was just who she was—kind and thoughtful.
Someone like her wouldn’t lie to him.
If she really hated this fake relationship, she wouldn’t have made those promises with me.
