Chapter 16
“Oh! You two are always here early for this class!”
Jiu said it as she spotted Noeul and Hansol sitting in the empty lecture hall.
“Yeah. The classroom’s the best place to wait,” Hansol replied.
Jiu plopped into the seat in front of them.
“Right? I think so too. When there’s like thirty awkward minutes left, it’s weird to spend money at a café, and if I go to the library, I’d have to leave five minutes after I sit down. I should just start coming straight here after my previous class and hang out with you guys.”
“Sure, sure.”
Jiu twisted sideways in her chair, swinging her feet back and forth, while Noeul and Hansol pulled out their class materials.
Watching them, Jiu asked,
“…Weren’t you two talking about something?”
“Talking?” Hansol said.
“Yeah. I heard you laughing all the way from the hallway, so I thought, wow, must be a fun conversation. I rushed in excited.”
“Uh… what were we talking about?” Hansol looked to Noeul.
“…No idea. Can’t remember, so it must’ve been ridiculously pointless,” Noeul said.
“Yeah, sounds about right.”
Jiu looked from one to the other.
“Now I’m curious. Tell me if you remember!”
“It was probably so trivial I won’t. But okay.”
They each turned back to their laptops and notes.
Noeul pointed at her screen. “Did you do this yet?”
“…Ah, crap, I forgot. Noeul, you could’ve warned me earlier. You waited till the most painful moment on purpose, didn’t you?”
“Don’t blame me for your laziness.”
Noeul chuckled. Hansol lightly punched her arm.
The little scene drew Jiu’s eyes—and for some reason left her uneasy. She couldn’t explain why.
Whenever Jiu’s mood dipped, she covered it by talking brighter and louder, until even she forgot she’d felt bad.
“What is it? What didn’t you do?” she asked.
“The crisis-management assignment. It’s right after this class and Noeul only just mentioned it.”
“Seriously? Noeul, that’s mean. You should’ve given a heads-up.”
“See?” Hansol shot Noeul a mock glare.
“Blame your own forgetfulness,” Noeul said.
Hansol gave her another playful tap, and Jiu felt her mood lift a little.
She liked hanging out with Noeul and Hansol. They were funny, cool, more mature than most, with a quiet depth and maybe even a hint of secret sorrow—something Jiu felt she lacked.
She often worried she seemed too lightweight, like people thought she’d lived an easy, carefree life without troubles or serious thoughts. And honestly, that wasn’t far off. Sometimes she wished she had a hidden pain or heavy secret, something that might give her the same aura Noeul and Hansol had.
Maybe she liked them because they had something she didn’t. Maybe it was admiration.
Thinking of that, she remembered how much fun they’d all had last time the four of them hung out.
She went to plenty of drinking meet-ups, but few were actually fun anymore—just routine because friends asked, because she was lively and kept the chatter going. Better than staying home alone, she’d tell herself, even if it wasn’t exciting.
But that night with Noeul, Hansol, and Joon-gi had been different. Genuinely fun, the kind of night you don’t want to end. She’d wished they could keep meeting like that: studying together, drinking together, hanging out on weekends.
Yet when she messaged their group chat—“Anyone want lunch?”—only Joon-gi ever answered. Noeul and Hansol either didn’t reply or texted back much later.
So, since she was with them now, maybe she could set something up.
“What are you doing tonight?” she asked.
“Why?” Hansol said.
“Want to hit Seokdo Pocha? We can have mulhoe and soju. Or somewhere else if you prefer.”
“Hmm.” Hansol glanced at Noeul. Noeul gave Hansol a quick look back.
It was a fleeting moment, but Jiu noticed it as if in slow motion.
“I’ve got gym tonight, so probably not,” Hansol said.
“Oh really? No wonder you stay so fit.”
Jiu turned to Noeul. “You?”
“I should work on an assignment—kind of urgent.”
“Ah, got it. I really should learn to get ahead on assignments. If I get invited for drinks, I always put them off. Anyway, that’s a shame. Next time for sure.”
“Ask Joon-gi if he’s free,” Noeul suggested.
“Yeah… I’ll check with him later, I guess.”
Jiu thought, Well, better than being alone, I suppose.
Same old crowd, same old night.
“Anyone texted Noeul? If not, I can,” Joon-gi asked as they walked toward Seokdo Pocha.
“She’s probably doing that assignment,” Jiu said.
“You texted her?”
“Asked in class earlier—she said something urgent…”
“Oh, there’s Noeul,” Joon-gi interrupted.
Jiu followed his gaze.
Noeul and Hansol were walking toward the market.
“…”
Jiu blinked, staring at their backs.
“Sorry, what were you saying? Something about Noeul’s assignment?” Joon-gi asked.
“…Nothing. I was mistaken.”
“Oh… huh. Looks like those two are really tight now.”
Jiu stayed silent.
“Maybe they’re dating,” Byeong-jun teased. “Why else skip all these bars and head that far?”
“Maybe there’s some hidden gem of a restaurant,” Hyun-su said.
“Yeah—one that only serves a minimum of two portions,” Byeong-jun added.
“And they’d hate anyone else discovering it.”
“So they sneak off together for secret meals. Eat and split,” Hyun-su laughed.
“More believable than dating, actually.”
They snickered. Joon-gi gave a small smile and glanced at Jiu.
“You never know with a guy and a girl,” he said.
“No, I think we can guess with those two,” another chimed in.
Everyone laughed.
Jiu didn’t.
Why did I even come out tonight? she thought. It’s going to be boring and a waste of time.
Is this really what they find funny?
She looked back toward the market where Noeul and Hansol had disappeared. She remembered that quick exchange of glances earlier.
Were they saying with their eyes, “Should we invite Jiu? …Nah, just us”?
Why hadn’t they included her?
They’d all hung out just fine last weekend. Nothing had happened in between. Did they just want to see each other without her? Were they actually dating? And if so, why lie? Did they not want her to know?
Her thoughts churned.
…I could just ask.
She messaged Noeul:
Hey, you two out drinking? I saw you and Hansol heading into the market. Busted.
About an hour later, Noeul replied:
I’m so sorry. Honestly, we’d love for you to come, but when you come everyone else wants to join too. Hansol and I just wanted a quiet night this time. Really sorry for lying. Hansol’s apologizing too—seriously, sorry.
Jiu stared at the message.
It made sense.
If someone had asked Jiu what she was doing tonight, she would’ve said, “Drinking with Noeul and Hansol,” and plenty of people would have invited themselves along.
And it’s not like they could say, “Don’t come, you make it too loud.”
Of course they’d just make an excuse.
She read the line again:
Honestly, we’d love for you to come…
Was that true?
At least it wasn’t that they disliked her. But still… couldn’t they have invited just her, told her to keep it secret?
Do they think I can’t keep a secret? That I’m loose-lipped?
It felt like there was a circle that included the three of them, and inside it, a smaller circle that was just Noeul and Hansol.
…Anyway, I’m hurt.
She sent back a bunny sticker turning its head away.
“What’s up?” Joon-gi asked.
“I just messaged Noeul,” Jiu said, setting down her phone.
Joon-gi’s face stiffened slightly.
“Uh… isn’t she hanging with Hansol?”
“Yeah.”
“Why just the two of them?”
“…They said they had stuff to talk about.”
“Really? Do guys and girls usually have private stuff like that?”
“They might.”
“Usually not, though. I don’t have anything to talk about alone with Hansol.”
“Noeul might.”
“Noeul’s pretty popular with girls, you know.”
“Mm.”
“Maybe people go to her for advice?”
“Beats me.”
Why did Joon-gi keep bringing up Noeul? Wasn’t there anything else to talk about?
She’d expected a dull night, but it was worse than dull.
Maybe she really would have been happier alone.
What are Noeul and Hansol doing now?
Probably having a great time—quiet drinks, trading jokes and serious thoughts, laughing. Their humor probably clicked perfectly. I should be there. Why am I here?
A sudden snap of fingers in front of her broke her thoughts.
It was Byeong-jun.
“Jiu, you’re not falling asleep, right?”
“No, I’m awake.”
She straightened in her chair.
“Want to step outside for a bit?” he asked.
“I’m fine.”
“I’m heading to the convenience store for cigarettes. If you’re sleepy, come along.”
“I said I’m not sleepy.”
“I’ll buy you ice cream if you come.”
“…I’m not sleepy.”
“Oh… okay. I just thought you were.”
He scratched his head awkwardly and left.
How can he still think I’m sleepy after I said three times I’m not?
She knew why he was really asking, of course, but still—shouldn’t he take the hint?
She glanced at the next table.
A guy there quickly ducked his head when their eyes met.
He’d confessed to her last semester after barely a few conversations, which had startled her.
Ever since, he showed up at the same drinking parties but never spoke to her—just stole glances and looked away when caught.
Across the room two girls were laughing together.
Jiu had only recently realized: at drinking parties, the girls always sat far from her.
So she was usually surrounded by guys.
She wished she could get close to the girls too, but it never happened.
They weren’t unfriendly—they greeted her cheerfully on campus—but that was it.
Never a one-on-one drink, never a deep conversation.
A sudden weariness settled over her.
I’ve been to so many of these gatherings, and I don’t have a single close friend here?
Am I doing something wrong?
Do I talk weird? Is my attitude off? Too silly? Overbearing? Maybe I’m not actually fun?
Jiu tilted her head, frowning in thought.
