Chapter 63
Late at night, in the Cartel mansion.
Inside the bedroom of the mansion’s master, Derwin, Chell entered through teleportation magic.
With light pink hair and mint-colored eyes, just like the human Shanelica, Chell had just returned from being summoned to the council of elders.
The day Road’s amnesia had been confirmed, Chell had gone to the royal palace. Not because of Derwin’s request to heal Shanelica, but because he was worried about the hatchling, Asha.
Of course, sneaking in and out of the place guarded by the human king with teleportation magic was dangerous. So Chell altered his appearance to resemble Shanelica’s family. Looking exactly like her, he was able to check on her near-death condition without arousing suspicion.
Afterward, Chell had reported everything to the elders. Now, he was facing a daunting trial. Looking at Derwin, who didn’t flinch at his sudden appearance and only gazed at him quietly, Chell swallowed dryly.
“Convince the Road and bring him to Crater.”
It was the stern order of the council of elders. Since Road could not be forcibly summoned like ordinary dragons, persuasion was essential.
Cursed be it. If only I had held out one more year. Why did I send Asha out?
Chell grabbed at his own pink hair, identical to Shanelica’s, in frustration.
They said dragons, with their long lives, rarely clung to life’s desires. But not Chell. Though a holy dragon, he wasn’t even a thousand years old yet — still young — and he clung to life fiercely.
He was prepared to be punished for sending Asha into the human world. But thinking that the restored Road might kill him for what he had done — that was unbearable. Road, a being above the law, certainly could.
“Are you the one who came yesterday?”
Before Chell could speak, Derwin asked first.
The human standing before him looked like Shanelica. To the eye, he was a completely different person from the man of yesterday. But seeing him teleport in and recognizing the look in his eyes, Derwin was certain this was the same being as before.
“Yes, Road. I am Cherpinebaisis of the Clan of Recording. I greet you.”
“Is Lady Shanelica safe?”
Derwin, looking even more haggard than yesterday, asked.
“The human king is taking good care of her. It will take some time for her to recover, but there’s no immediate danger.”
“You are not taking her away?”
“Wounds received in a polymorphed state are safest to heal while in that state. Especially during the hatchling stage.”
Derwin sighed, half in relief and half in worry. Watching him, Chell shifted to the real point.
“You need not worry about Ashanerbekirael. More importantly, Road, forgive me, but you must come with me to Spicher Island.”
So the time has come.
Derwin thought. It felt surreal, but somewhere in his mind, he had once thought such a day might arrive.
Closing his weary eyes for a moment, then opening them, Derwin asked,
“You want me to go alone, leaving Lady Shanelica here?”
“Yes. That is the council’s decision.”
“And what will become of her?”
“Her case, connected to Ashanerbekirael, will be judged by the Hatchling Protection Committee and the Disciplinary Committee. Until those proceedings end, she will be protected here under the watch of the Spirit King of Wind.”
The names of the committees were unfamiliar, but Derwin didn’t need further explanation. He could sense what such bodies were for.
“If I go there… will I regain my memories as a dragon?”
Even now, the idea that he might be a dragon felt foreign on his tongue.
“I cannot guarantee it, but most likely. The elders will do their utmost — they must, if the proceedings are to move forward.”
Derwin was silent for a long moment, before asking heavily,
“Lady Shanelica was certain I was a dragon. And you, as well. Do you still… believe that?”
“Yes. Without question, it is the undeniable truth.”
Chell answered instantly, so firmly that Derwin almost regretted having asked.
Looking into the face so like Shanelica’s, filled with conviction, Derwin felt strange. It was as if he could see Shanelica’s certainty overlapping Chell’s words: You are the Dragon Lord.
“Then why have I lost all memory of being a dragon?”
That was the greatest question, one that gnawed its way into his disbelief. But Chell didn’t know the answer either. More than anyone, Chell wondered how such a thing had happened.
“That… only the Road who regains his memories would know.”
Chell phrased it carefully, hiding how desperate he too was for the answer.
“Then one more question. If I regain those memories, will I lose all memory of my human life?”
“That, too, is unknown.”
“….”
“For dragons, to lose memory at all — like you have — is unheard of. Unlike other beings, our memories are bound not only to our minds but also to our dragon hearts, so even the oldest memories can be recalled.”
“So my memory loss is not normal.”
“It is nearly impossible. Yet it has happened to you. Since this is the first time, no one knows what will follow.”
Chell did not give Derwin the reassurance he wanted. Everything was uncertain. Which meant — regaining his dragon memories might mean losing everything of his human life.
No.
The rejection welled up inside Derwin. Not just because he didn’t want to forget the human he had been, but above all because he might forget his love for Shanelica.
According to her, the Dragon Lord had not been close to her. Derwin didn’t know what she had thought of Road, but at least he knew their bond had not been born of mutual love.
That was why, more than anything, he didn’t want to let go of his feelings for Shanelica. He wanted to know why she suddenly rejected him, what went wrong to bring them here. He did not want to bury everything and return to being some unimaginable being called the Dragon Lord.
“If I refuse to go, what happens?”
Chell inhaled sharply. He forced himself to stay composed. He had to persuade Road no matter what.
“I cannot take you by force. But… I beg you, please come with me.”
Chell bent to his knees, nearly pressing his forehead to the floor.
“Your bond-partner nearly died in the human world, and you yourself have lost your memories. News of this has spread. The dragon society will be thrown into chaos such as it has never known. To set things right, you must return to your true self.”
Derwin understood what Chell meant. Yet…
“I do not want to lose my humanity.”
Not his memories of Shanelica, not his life as a man. That was his fierce attachment.
No… perhaps I already knew I was a dragon.
Only now did Derwin admit the contradiction within himself.
When Shanelica had called him a dragon at first sight, and when this mysterious being now called him Road… he had at least once imagined it might be true.
But he had refused to believe. Not that he couldn’t imagine it — but that he wouldn’t.
It wasn’t inability. It was pressure — some terrible force whispering, You must not. Not disbelief, but refusal to believe. A compulsion to cling to his current life.
Just like my past.
It was the same as the way he treated his human past — something he had never told anyone, never wanted to reveal.
As a child, he had killed those around him.
Why? He couldn’t remember. His mind had been broken. But the truth was clear: he had killed his gentle parents and the kind villagers without hesitation. People whispered he was the return of a god of destruction.
Yet he had wanted to live. He wanted to erase that past and live righteously.
Then someone — he couldn’t remember who — had made him an offer: if he never spoke of his past, he could have the new life he longed for.
So he had hidden it all. He had fought with the black longbow he carried, won himself a reputation, and built his life anew.
That was why, even when Shanelica asked him, he could not speak of his past. If he spoke it, he felt the nightmare would repeat.
That same compulsion — not to reveal his past, not to be a dragon — felt identical. As though every drop of his blood whispered, Live only as a man who cannot speak of his past.
Seeing Derwin’s heavy expression, Chell spoke again.
“Road, if you remain here, lost in memory, what will become of Asha?”
“What do you mean?”
“Asha broke the law to seek you, entering the human world despite being a hatchling. Soon, she will be tried before the Disciplinary Committee. Your presence as her bond-partner will weigh heavily on their judgment.”
“To punish someone who nearly died? How is that justice?”
“It is the law. And Road — you stand above that law.”
“…Am I truly such a powerful being?”
Chell concealed his anxiety as best he could.
“You are a being no dragon could even dare to look upon.”
So… even if I don’t want to return as Road, I must — for her sake.
At that thought, Derwin saw Shanelica’s smiling face in his mind. Then also her broken, near-dead figure from just days before.
Punishment? Impossible. For her sake, there was nothing he wouldn’t do.
But as soon as he resolved himself, fear crushed his chest.
Fear? Why?
Every time he thought of returning as a dragon, he felt every cell screaming No! Just as terror had seized him whenever he thought of speaking of his past.
I’m afraid. I don’t want to be a dragon again.
But if it was for Shanelica’s sake, he had to.
“…I will go.”
As fear and dread knotted together, his whole body shook. His chest tightened, his breath caught. Breathing became painful.
“Are you all right, Road?”
Chell, startled, asked with wide eyes. Derwin gritted his teeth.
“Yes. I will go.”
It was hard to say, but Derwin forced the words out. Better that he bear this crushing pain than let Shanelica suffer.
