Chapter 57
“Do you hate Sid, ma’am?”
After Sidarius disappeared, Esther asked, expressionless.
Her gaze, perched on the windowsill like a boomerang returning to its place, landed on Esther.
“…I don’t know.”
“Hmm.”
Esther jumped onto the dining table standing alone in the middle of the room and sat down, struggling a little.
“Then… do you like it?”
“…I don’t know.”
“Then… do you want to meet the Emperor again?”
At Esther’s question, her pupils trembled slightly.
She only showed emotion when talking about the Emperor.
“…Maybe yes, maybe no.”
“Why?”
I thought she would say she wanted to meet him immediately, but that was unexpected. Meeting the Emperor seemed necessary to save her, after all.
“…I’m already broken. I’m probably neither the beautiful woman he imagined nor the gentle woman he pictured. I’d only get in the way of his life.”
She didn’t want to show her changed self.
What she said was clear.
“If only Sid hadn’t existed…”
Her shoulders flinched at Esther’s unexpected words. Her gaze, fixed outside the window, slowly shifted.
“Then your life wouldn’t have been ruined, and you wouldn’t have parted with the Emperor, right?”
“…You.”
“Then, ma’am…”
Esther smiled.
It was almost unbelievable that such sharp, cold words came from a child with an innocent face.
Her expression stiffened.
“Why didn’t you kill him?”
“…What?”
“When he was born, when he was young, when he was weak… you should have killed him.”
It was not an illusion that her already pale skin turned even whiter.
“Why?”
“…Stop.”
“I’m just curious. There was the easiest way…”
“I said stop!”
With her frail hands clenched into fists, she slammed the wall violently and shouted like a scream.
‘…Wow, she’s got quite a temper.’
Esther quietly closed her mouth.
“I… I…”
With a contorted expression, the woman grabbed her hair and muttered in confusion.
At that moment, a parchment appeared before Esther.
[To the one who longs for death.]
“I want to die.”
Lyla Morus had not thought that way from the beginning.
“If only it weren’t for you…”
She didn’t begin with blame.
But she couldn’t bear children.
But she loved him too much.
But she wished to stay by his side.
But she and he desired the fruit of their love.
So she meddled in what humans should never touch, experimenting on herself.
She was born with a curse. Perhaps it wasn’t her fault. It was ‘Death’ who had sinned against the ‘Primordial.’
‘Death’ only spoke curses and grievances toward the ‘Primordial,’ who endlessly unleashed life.
As the Primordial created life, chaos began to settle in the world.
Thus, the Primordial said:
“I am the Primordial, the Beginning. Then you shall be Death, the End.”
Thus, the Primordial and Death were born into the world.
She was a distant descendant of ‘Death.’
At first, she didn’t understand what it meant.
Even living alone in a house far from the city, she was happy. She knew how to find happiness.
Because her mother had always been a smiling person.
Her mother said:
“If you love everything, there’s no need to cling to any one thing.”
So she could find happiness anywhere.
From a seed planted a month ago bearing fruit, to wild animals suddenly appearing and leaving.
But she was taught to keep away from humans.
“Do not give your heart to people. You will only get hurt.”
Her mother even made her infertile at a young age to protect future generations.
Under such caution, Lyla Morus, who always guarded herself when meeting humans, eventually met someone.
A beautiful man, deeply wounded.
And that meeting changed her.
Lyla no longer found love in trivial things.
More precious than birds chirping, more precious than wild animals nestling into her, was his single smile.
When emotions ignite, they turn into obsession.
Thus she gave birth.
It was a birth not ordained by the Primordial, a ‘creation of life’ not permitted, a seed cultivated with blood in a small flask.
Seeing this defiance, the Primordial named it:
“Homunculus.”
You might be the only person capable of giving her what she wants.
Esther sensed she didn’t even need to specify what that was.
Feeling a little distant, she looked away from the parchment. Its meaning was clear.
She had not gone mad because of uncontrollable dark magic. If anything, it was emotion.
She could control the raging dark power. That’s why she maintained her sanity.
But she could not forgive herself for giving birth to a monster.
That’s why she could not endure being near the Emperor.
That’s why the human Lyla Morus had gone insane.
Because no one could bear the mistakes she had committed without going mad.
“I just…!”
Seeing her unable to speak, Esther held back her words.
‘A homunculus….’
Even if she wanted a child, humans were cruel.
In ancient times, far before Esther was a Demon Lord, such creatures existed.
But making homunculi was extremely complicated, and even if made, they wouldn’t live long.
Humans born from a flask were fragile and weak.
Hence, they disappeared in ancient times.
‘But that kid… is a homunculus?’
Yet she looked completely human.
“Don’t worry, ma’am.”
Shaking off her thoughts, Esther spoke.
The distorted-faced woman slowly lifted her head. Their gazes met, and Esther smiled brightly.
“I’ll help you. Be a little more honest. I’ll let you meet the Emperor. Then you’ll have no reason to hate that child.”
Esther said with certainty, smiling as her plump cheeks moved softly.
Esther was sure.
It was simple calculation.
Lyla had lost her one true love, so she resented Sidarius.
If the Emperor were returned to her, Lyla would inevitably love Sidarius again.
If that happened, Lyla wouldn’t die, and Sidarius would get the maternal attention he longed for.
[If I can’t let you meet the Emperor, then I’ll let you die as you wish.]
Now, the child speaking in a forgotten language smiled innocently, saying things you wouldn’t expect from a child.
[So until then, do your best.]
Esther’s offered bait was irresistibly sweet.
[The reason you hate him is this. I’ll return him to the way he was. Now you can forgive yourself and let go of your hatred. You’ve done nothing wrong.]
It had been what the woman had longed for over a long time. At least, Esther believed so.
From that day on, Esther went to the palace on every promised day.
She regularly saw the Emperor and visited Sidarius and Lyla.
“Mother, I brought some food… and Esther is here too.”
“…Alright, have a seat.”
“Ma’am!”
A faint smile appeared on Lyla’s lips.
“Come in.”
“Yay! I snuck some cookies today!”
“Snuck? From where?”
After Esther’s intervention, Lyla began to change little by little.
She had been silent that day, but from the next, she behaved almost like a different person.
She answered Sidarius’s words, smiled, and sometimes touched him, asking small questions.
“…Ah! And sometimes make eye contact too. Thank you. It’s thanks to you.”
Sidarius smiled widely as he talked about daily matters. The curve of his eyes made him look truly happy.
Usually expressionless, Sidarius had changed significantly in just a week.
‘With a tail and ears, he’d look exactly like a puppy.’
Esther stroked her chin.
It reminded her of an old Cerberus she had raised.
Eyes sparkling, tail wagging vigorously from side to side.
“Esther… why are you being so nice to me?”
“Me?”
Sidarius stopped and asked cautiously.
“Yes, you… protecting me when the others teased me… even my mother… things have changed thanks to you. Why are you doing this? I have nothing to give.”
Esther blinked.
‘Nothing to give… if anything, I’m a rare item among rare items.’
She tilted her hand toward Sidarius.
Sidarius crouched to meet her eye level.
Esther stroked Sidarius’s head gently.
“Well, I take good care of what’s mine.”
“…Yours?”
“Yes.”
If there’s an exclamation above one’s head, it’s definitely mine.
‘Though it’ll disappear soon.’
Sidarius’s eyes widened.
“…I’m yours?”
“Yes.”
“Esther… are you on my side…?”
“Yes.”
“…You won’t leave me?”
Instead of answering, Esther shrugged lightly. He clenched his fists, reading meaning into the shrug.
“I… am on your side too, Esther.”
With blue eyes, Sidarius said firmly to Esther.
